I think in the Philippines we officially have 3 genders: Ma’am, Sir, and Ma’am-Sir.

Do you ever notice how salesladies in the malls and food courts often greet you with “Yes, Ma’am-Sir!” even though you are just alone, or you are with someone and you are both female or both male?  And why do they always say “Yes”?  Did we ask them a Yes-No question?

I remember when I approached a fast food store in a mall, and the manager said, “Ay, Ma’am, closed na po kami, Sir.” [Oh, Ma’am, we are already closed, Sir.]  Huh??? 

Then there is the plural variant. In a restaurant, we were called “Ma’am-Sirs.” So this is how to pluralize this gender-generic Filipino linguistic phenomenon. Huh???  How about “Sir-Ma’ams”?

I have heard of an even more shocking version.  “Yes, Ma’am!” and the greeter was addressing a group of men! It seems that in most parts of our country “Ma’am” has become an omnibus term, applying to male and female, singular and plural. 

In trying to understand why Filipinos are rather gender-insensitive, or maybe I should say “linguistically gender-confused,” I theorize that it is because our language has nouns and pronouns that are not gendered like their counterparts in other languages.  For example, “siya” is the third person singular pronoun in Filipino used to refer to either male or female.  In English, there are two counterpart pronouns for “siya,” namely, “he” for male and “she” for female.  So we have Filipinos who refer to females as “he” and to males as “she,” oblivious to the gender distinctions. For example: “My mother is sick. He is in the hospital.” “My sister is beautiful. He looks like me.” “My father is strict.  She got angry.”

The Filipino word for child is “anak,” whether we are referring to a son or a daughter.  Filipinos say “tao” to refer to mankind.  Thus, English genders humanity, but the Filipino language does not. The Biblical term “Son of Man” is gendered in the masculine, while we Filipinos translate this messianic term as “Anak ng Tao,” which is not gendered.  Feminists and egalitarians squirm at how discriminatory against women certain English Biblical terms are, like “brethren,” which is masculine, while Filipinos say “mga kapatid” to refer to brothers and sisters as a group.  So there is not much of a political incorrectness in the Tagalog Bible.  To some extent, therefore, the fact that the Filipino language is not gendered can be advantageous.  However, this nuance has tended to blur our capacity as a people to distinguish between male and female.

The explanation for this “Ma’am-Sir” phenomenon can be as complex as what I have theorized, but it can also be as simple as the greeters conserving their words or their energy to speak, so they clump the two genders into the uniquely modern phenomenal Filipino compound noun “Ma’am-Sir.”  After all, these greeters have to greet hundreds or even thousands of potential customers and passersby 8 to 12 hours a day everyday, 6 days a week.

“Ma’am-Sir” has become such a common part of greeting in the commercial places in the Philippines that most Filipinos merely overlook or tolerate the error being said when that term does not apply to the people being greeted.  If I may, I would like to suggest alternative greetings and a different attitude in greeting consumers.

First of all, the greeters need to be alert to the gender of the consumer and not be robotic in churning out their greeting.  The problem has been that the greeters have put themselves on an auto-pilot mode and have become virtually blind to the people they are greeting until they are inquired upon, at which point they are usually shocked out of their auto-pilot mode.

Secondly, if the greeters are greeting a male and a female, they should say, “Hi, Ma’am.  Hi, Sir.”  Bother to separate the greeting for the female from the greeting for the male.  Better yet, I would like to suggest bothering to greet, depending on the time of day, the consumers, “Good morning, Ma’am. Good morning, Sir.”  Saying “good morning,” “good afternoon,” or “good evening” is better than saying “hi,” because it is more polite and more formal.

If the consumers are both females or both males, then the greeter can greet each of the two.  That is not tiring to do, is it?  “Good morning, Ma’am,” then smile at that female, after which smile at the other female and repeat the greeting. A counterpart suggestion goes for greeting two men.  “Good morning, Sir,” then smile, then turn your attention to the other male and repeat the greeting. That is better than using the plural “Ma’ams” and “Sirs” which makes the greeting sound unnatural. 

Actually, since the term Ma’am refers to a lady, the better plural of Ma’am is Ladies.  The corresponding plural for Sir is Gentlemen.  However, culturally, in the Philippines, it is unthinkable for a saleslady or a security guard to greet consumers, “Good morning, Ladies” or “Good morning, Gentlemen.” Using such greetings would be considered rude and disrespectful if said by a saleslady or a security guard. The Philippines does not have a flat society, unlike the U.S.. There are social hierarchies in our country, and people in service-oriented jobs are expected to humble themselves before the consumers. Addressing the women “Ladies” and the men “Gentlemen” is only acceptable if you have some authority, like you are the host of an event or a public speaker or you are the boss.

This leaves us with the question how a group of men or a group of women or a mixed group of men and women should be greeted in a commercial area in the Philippine context.  It would be impractical to greet each and every one of them.  How easy it would be to just say “Hi, everyone!” or “Good evening, everyone!” but, again, such greetings convey a lack of respect in the context of our country if said by service personnel.  The simple solution I can think of is to just drop the address and greet according to the time of day.  “Good morning!” A better solution, I would think, is to add a Filipino flair in greeting a group, regardless of gender, by using our term for politeness, “po.”  Try this: “Good evening, po!” 

I am here in General Santos City in southern Mindanao as I write this article, and here the locals do not have any linguistic problem in greeting others.  They have concocted a unique, captivating, strategic, tourism-oriented greeting that showcases their pride in their city, whether the greeter is its mayor, the young Mayor Darlene Antonino – Custodio, or its congressman, world boxing sensation Manny Pacquiao, or a tuna fisherman, a saleslady, a security guard, a public speaker, a teacher, or the owner of tourism gem Sarangani Highlands Hotel, Dr. Anabelle Lapaz, or entertainment personalities Melai and Gerald Anderson, or Ms. Universe runner-up Shamcey Supsup.  Their greeting makes social hierarchy a non-issue.  The time of day is not even a consideration for “The Generals,” as the locals here are called.  Here, anytime of the day, you are vibrantly greeted, “Magandang Gen San!” In Gen San City, they take their greeting seriously. It has become their identifying mark.  That is exemplary.  Cities, provinces, commercial places, and institutions in the Philippines would do well to put importance in how they formulate their greeting, which is the first touchpoint with the public.

For more of Pinay@heart, visit http://www.journal.com.ph/index.php/opinion/pinayheart/ and http://www.rubycalo.wordpress.com   

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